This is a post from my personal life. When I grew up I was so often told by my parents “I would amount to nothing” or that I needed to be put in an AFC. By most peoples standards I’m doing very well, earning $1,500 a month, driving, and living on my own – but I’m not happy, and people don’t understand.I work in a factory setting during third shift. I love the work, but as most factories there are repeated noises, repeated alarms, fluorescent lighting and I don’t feel passionate about the work. I feel like I should have more of a personal investment in what I do. Right now my only investment is getting a paycheck.
I have for a long time been seriously debating applying as a Peer Support Specialist with the local mental health agency. I doubt they make great money, but honestly it’s something I would feel like I’m making an investment in – something that makes a real difference in things I care about.
Part of me is scared though, a lot of the peer support people in my area seem to have this attitude that they are better then everyone else with conditions because they work for the system. Its caused me to really hate the peer support movement as a whole for the last year or two. I’m scared of becoming ‘one of them’. I want to make a positive difference in people, not ridicule, belittle and insult people who need help the most.
I know this is a long rant, and I really hate posting details on my personal life here. But frankly I’m at a loss of direction.
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
As a parent, I am very sorry about your present situation. I am very impressed with your initiative and level of responsibility that you have reached. I encourage you to consider other possible job positions, with less invasive working conditions, to maintain an income while you explore the many other contributions you can make. I understand your concern about the peer support specialist role. You don’t have to limit yourself to a specific role…use the creativity you have been blessed with. The best revenge for negative comments/situations is to PROVE THEM WRONG!
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I think you should give it a go. Maybe you’ll make a positive difference in the way these people think of themselves compared to autistic people.
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Seems to be invoking the old heirarchy of impairments, familiar throughout the disability movement of the difference between those with invisible or mild conditions who can pass and those who cannot.
One side cleaves toward the normal because they can, but never on the same terms as the “normal” All too often one finds this group being advised not to appear “disabled” because it is stigmatising.
Well whatever, there is a terrible danger too of being identified as the “super aspie” the ultra positive example of all those PhD’s out there which I am dangerously close to joining myself.
Thing is I can’t help my intellect, I can dress in a smart suit of clothes and do presentations and lectures, at a level that goes way beyond the average undergrad, but I am still the same person inside, just as disabled by the system that does not accommodate my differences properly and leads to my experiencing way more stress than the average academic.
I think for me though the biggest danger of working for the system, would be of considering myself better than my academic peers rather than my aspie peers, and in a way that is just as bad.
Peer comes from the latin pares, and means equal.
One sometimes struggles so hard for equality though, that one has to work that much harder to prove oneself, which I guess is what I find myself doing.
It’s bad for my liver. Go figure on that one
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I think you should give it a go. I don’t see it as becoming “one of them” but an opportunity to make a difference and try and make a change. What is better than that? The worst that could happen is that you hate it. If you leave your job at the factory under decent conditions (by giving an appropriate notice), then there should be no reason not to take you back should the peer support job not work out.
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