Yesterday I had a talk with one of my pastors about Aspergers Syndrome, and he keeps saying he feels God will heal me one day and I will be normal. To be honest this angers me and I’m not sure why. I believe Aspergers is a big part of who I am, Aspergers helps define how I think, what I fear, what I want, what I need – its a big part of my life. When people talk about how I will be healed it makes me think there not accepting me for who I am. I also wonder if they would say the same to a blind person, or an amputee?
Does the fact that my disability is one that effects the mental part of me make it a disability that should be healed by God? I’m going to be honest in saying this theological question has caused me great pains with my church – to the point of where I am starting to feel unwelcome. I don’t think its my churches intention to harm me in anyway, but how do I get them to accept me for who I am, Aspergers and all?
Also I would like to know if you have had any similar stories in your past and how you got through them. Also feel free to check out my new Online Community for Disabled Christians.
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I believe that is very angering. I don’t think they mean any harm by it, but they don’t see how it is offensive either. They view Asperger’s as the thing that is “wrong ” with you, that needs to be “fixed” like the rest of society.
It never occurs to them that we do not suffer from our condition or that we could even enjoy who we are and the gifts given by it. They hear it only described as a problem that causes this issue and that issue. They never hear someone describe it in a way they could understand.
I like to say to them “Imagine a set of issues and gifts that you have, and that they come under a label. You don’t mind the issues, you work on them like others work on thier issues without labels. And the gifts are wonderful. This that you have is what makes you YOU. Now imagine society as a whole tells you that because of this label you are broken.
You need to be fixed. And that nothing possitive could ever come from what you have. Now, tell me, how does that make you feel?” I hear alot of people say afterwards that they never thought of it like that.
I like to sa politely that we all have issues, mine simply has a label. And like anyone else, I face and deal with my issues. And my label does not make my issues worse or better than yours any more than you not having a label makes your issues better or worse than mine.
We all are still in the same boat, mine just has a name. It does change thier perspective of Asperger’s when you are willing to show them things through your eyes.
I don’t blame you for being angry. The implication that you are “sick” and need to be “healed” is quite offensive, but sadly par for the course.
Theo – That’s a great analogy! I’d love to use that on some of my “parents of autistic kids” lists.
As a Christian, I don’t believe you need to be healed, but that you are made exactly as God intended you. That rubs me the wrong way, too.
“I also wonder if they would say the same to a blind person, or an amputee?”
Good question, especially about the amputee example! Nobody’s born with an amputation, it’s not how God made anyone, and how many amputees are all “don’t talk about my limb loss as if it was a bad thing” instead of being all “don’t talk about me as if my limb loss makes me less of a person” *and* having negative opinions the injuries* and infections** that robbed them of limbs they used to use?
* like when a heavy wall falls on someone’s leg during an earthquake and the only way to leave the rubble is to leave the leg behind
** like gangrene that wasn’t treated in time and speads through the limb and risks infecting and killing the rest of the patient, which happened to a lot of soldiers in WWI and WWII
Interesting topic.
I will say that if someone told me God would heal me (make me neurotypical), I can’t say I’d mind too much. I’m not sure exactly why…well theologically the reason is that I would not object to whatever is God’s will to do with me. Other than theologically, I would not be opposed to becoming NT (might almost welcome it), perhaps because the drawbacks of it for me seem to outweigh any benefits.
Now, I’m also legally blind…if it were God’s will to heal me of that, other than theologically submitting to God’s will, that would probably throw me for a loop. Perhaps because I knew it was an issue my whole life, and have gotten comfortable with it. I only suspected the other issues were Asperger’s since I first heard of it when I was 19, and only officially diagnosed at 24…I’m now 26. I guess, for me, I wouldn’t mind if God chose to remove my AS related ‘issues’.
Now, as far as someone telling you that God will heal you…if that’s just out of the blue without regard to your feelings (especially if they are not reeeeeeaaaaaalllllllllllly sure it’s God’s will and not simply their own opinion), that would seem a bit harsh. If they know that you are comfortable with Asperger’s, and wouldn’t want to be NT, then that would be really harsh.
I understand how frustrating your pastor, though well-meaning, can be, and it definitely sounds unkind and unthinking.
I am the Founder and Editor-in-Chief at Autism Sucks, and I didn’t start the blog to alienate the autism community, of which I am a part. (I have two children with HFA and one with AS, and my husband is more than likely on the Spectrum as well). I started Autism Sucks because I wanted to give parents a place to commiserate. We absolutely love our children, no question. We just don’t always love autism. Do you? There are other traits about myself that I don’t always love (I really stink at karate, but I am just not that coordinated) that I accept as part of who I am. That’s ok. I can accept it and still say it frustrates me. See? It doesn’t mean I don’t see the positives…I take karate and enjoy it, but I can lament that I won’t ever be a karate national champion.
Do I think autism is curable? I don’t know. I lean towards no, for most kids. There is a huge difference in taking care of a child with Asperger’s as compared to a lower-functioning child. All autism is not created equal. So, keep that in mind. I think it is important for parents who feel alone to know they are NOT alone. It helps to talk about it, and learn to deal with it, together.
Just like you do here.
Tina Cruz
I just wish there was a community where the whole autism community could get along.
I’ve got Aspergers business cards to hand out when people want to be my friend or might judge me for my handicap. The front is the DSM 4 abbreviated and the back is the positive attributes. Solves a lot of problems. Not all, but a lot.
Aspergers will never be healed; it is genetic. Autism is not genetic at all, but is caused by poisons. I subscribe to an autism chelation forum, reading about their struggles and victories of getting out from under it. I think Aspergers comes from Homo Neanderthal genes that are mixed in with sapiens. We are just on the wrong planet.
Faith is the assurance of the things we hope for that comes when we pray; it is the conviction of things not seen when we pray. As I pray for someone, when the assurance and conviction descend, I stop praying and ask the person how they are. They always are joyful because they are healed.
Hinduism has gotten into the church. In Hinduism, I am part God, so when I believe something hard enough, I make it come into being. The only problem with that is it doesn’t work.
Um, you’re completely wrong about that. For one thing, there is not proof autism is caused by poisons. Another is that the concept that each human being was made in God’s image and the through Jesus Christ we all have His standing with God- that is not Hinduism in any way. Barely any Christian church believes or teaches that you can create something out of nothing; you completely misunderstand the entire concept. It is faith, which is evidence for things not seen, that is the basis for the belief that you can have anything you believe for. God awards faith, that is how it works.
If you can sit there and claim any part of evolution as true and real, and still claim you heal people and that you understand Christianity… you’re the one who needs their head examined. NONE of those fit together, let alone make any sense.
Char, though this is is getting a bit about aspergers I felt I had to respond to your response.
The tone of your letter is typical of many christians today. You love to correct others and feed your need to feel correct on every topic. If your motive was to educate Timuchin that would be one thing. But the flavor of the poison in your words comes through strongly. The person is verbalizing what she believes to be true which is her right, but she should be able to enjoy that freedom in peace. But along comes a person who is different than you, and believes in something different than you and you put her down. And even tell them to get their head checked. It would do you well to come down off your high cross and be more christion to a fellow person.
Go see http://groups.yahoo.com/group/adult-metal-chelation for autistic adults getting themselves cured by chelating poisons out of their bodies. Read their success stories. Read about how the medical establishment is trying to discourage it, despite its success.
Faith is the assurance of the things you hope for when you pray; it is the conviction of the things not seen when you pray. (Heb. 11:1) Faith is a gift of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 12:9) We pray for someone by hope; when God’s faith descends upon us, we can stop praying. The prayer is answered, even if we can’t see it at the moment. That faith that has descended can be as small as a mustard seed, but that is sufficient. God has spoken. When I sense someone is healed of cancer, I stop praying and tell them to go see their doctor for evidence.
When a Hindu tries to heal anything, they rely entirely upon their divinity to Believe what they want into existence. When it doesn’t happen, they blame the patient’s insufficient faith. What about their faith? Are they saying the whole thing is just the power of suggestion? Maybe they should try beating themselves to stir up their faith.
If I don’t get the faith while praying for someone, I try another tack. Are there generational curses? Are there poisons? Are there demons in their environment? Are there sins that are blocking God’s hand? How about unforgiveness? Do they prefer to die but are getting prayer for their family? Finally, if the gift of faith does not descend, I can honestly tell them that I don’t know why God isn’t healing but that happens and God still loves them.
Intraspecies evolution is fact. You can cross a white rose with a red rose and get a pink rose. But interspecies evolution doesn’t work. When you cross a horse and a donkey, you always get a sterile mule.
Neurotypicalism Sucks
Ok…. That statement is only one possible opinion. Asperger’S Syndrome doesn’t suck more than Neurotypicalism. Human beings simply are intolerant of differences. Aspergees Syndrome is AWESOME.
“Yesterday I had a talk with one of my pastors about Aspergers Syndrome, and he keeps saying he feels God will heal me one day and I will be normal. To be honest this angers me and I’m not sure why.”
Would he try to “heal” you of being left-handed? Or very tall? Those are also things we are born with that can cause difficulties dealing with things designed for the average.
I would think that there is healing for it. It is a problem that causes hopeless if we were to be honest. Maybe some people focus on the good aspects of Aspergers, but are we getting confused with the actual personality of the person or the Aspergers. It seems like it is hard to discern between Aspergers and the personality of a person. We have to understand that Aspergers is not the personality of the person, though the true personality of the person is masked by the Aspergers. On the other hand, we are all fallen people so everyone is probably masked. I think God wants people to develop their true personalities as much as possible, but that takes accepting Christ and letting the Holy Spirit work with you so that you can become more like Christ. Most people are stubborn and want nothing to do with Christ, therefore there is no healing for them. Sometimes healing takes a lifetime, and I think that Christ is more interested in our Spiritual healing first. We need to resolve that first. As far as Aspergers goes, I don’t know if I believe that the brain is wired differently or if it is more to do with an evil attack on a person. We are all attacked in different ways, and some people have tendencies to be a certain way; however, we do not have to give into them. The aspects of Aspergers that make me question the whole brain wiring thing is the selfish personality characteristics that seem to go hand in hand with this problem. A person with Aspergers can “rise to the occasion” so to speak, but it seems like the person chooses to either rise to the occasion or not rise to the occasion. A true autistic person does not have the ability to ever rise to the occasion, unless someone can draw this person out, or they are healed through a miracle. I think that there are more choices in Aspergers. I am not saying that there isn’t a disability of any kind there, but I am saying that the person can control many of the negative behaviors that are hurtful to others that he or she relates to. For example, many times an Asperger person will refuse to give another person what they need because the Asperger person believes that he or she does not have to. This does not line up with biblical teachings where a person is supposed to strive to put Jesus First, Others Second, and Self last. It doesn’t say in the bible that if you have Aspergers, you have a license to think of self first most of the time. In fact, all humans are expected to strive to put others first. A person who is a vegetable or severely retarded, or unable to function in life obviously cannot make a choice to accept Christ, let alone relate to other people-so I am sure that God takes that into consideration. People who have “Aspergers” are not retarded or in my opinion, really autistic. We are all supposed to improve upon our personalities with the help of the Holy Spirit and try to yield to Him.
I’m sure there are a lot of black people who would love for there to be a cure for their genetic social disability! None of them would admit, but I’d bet some of them have prayed to be white.
Likewise, there are Aspergers who have prayed to be neurotypical and got no answer, either.
Five years ago, when I got evidence that I had Aspergers, I couldn’t touch it for three months. To accept it meant the doom of my life’s ambition to be Normal. I finally accepted it out of honesty. I had to adapt to the unchangeable. I got in touch with the Center for Autism and Related Disorders in Jacksonville. The psychologist certified me as Aspergers. Now I could defend myself from all the rejection and criticism with that diagnosis. Being “handicapped” is acceptable in this society. I could mix with others who have the same way of thinking and therefore the same problems. I found my people. I’m at peace. I found my evangelistic field.
I abandoned all the Normal gerbil wheels of “climbing the corporate ladder” and “positivity for success.” I could specialize at what I could be good at. I’m starting to make a name for myself in the religion specialty. I’m one heck of an intercessor.
There are good Aspergers and there are evil Aspergers. When we are good, we are very good. When we are bad, we are very bad! An Aspergers Satanist is a formidable foe. Only another Aspergers can stop him.
Most of us need inner healing for the abuse and rejection we have been subjected to. See theophostic.org for a Christian way to attain healing of emotions. This works!
Aspergers is not your identity. Your identity is who you are in Christ. Your unique personality is separate from Aspergers. It is possible to think about things differently than other people, have special gifts and abilities, and just be different in general without having to have Aspergers. In my opinion Aspergers has kept a lot of people afflicted with it (not everyone) in bondage to themselves. They have extreme difficulties with relationships, and because of this, I don’t think it is a good thing. I am not saying that people are not supposed to have any limitations and life, but if you have a limitation that is keeping you from having the best relationship with God that you can personally have, and that is keeping you from having healthy relationships with others, especially in a marriage, than I would say that this is not God’s will for your life. God doesn’t want people with Aspergers to feel defeated in their lives, and since many people with Aspergers feel this way, I would say that it is something that needs to be healed. First and foremost, God is interested in your salvation-that you be saved. But he also wants your healing as a whole, too. If you feel that you are being treated differently because of this problem, you may want to try another bible believing Church. A real Christian church is one in which each person is treated the same by its members; however, the church should have healing and help for people who need it.
I have been taught by bullies that I am different. I have been shown by managers who fired me that I am different. I am different than the neurotypical portion of the population who run society.
If I could live with understanding neurotypicals or in a community of Aspergers, I would happily forget the difference.
Everyone is different. If we all looked and acted like the same it would be very boring.
kgaccount says aspergers isn’t autism? says wrongplanet? As if that’s bad? She says it because aspergers is not autism. If it were, you wouldn’t need different names for it. Everybody would just be called autistic. Or aspegergers. Furthermore, Wrongplanet seems to be wrong on kgaccount. Some of their followers seem to think kgaccount on youtube doesn’t have a right to show the world the severe sides of autism spectrum. Now that is just plain wrong. This mother is by far one of the most powerful advocates for severe autism and there’s nothing wrong planet can do to discredit her, because thousands have already seen her videos and have commented how incredibly important, educational and moving they are. Nothing like it has ever been shown to public before. Some of it is shocking, yes, and disturbing. But it’s real. It’s true. And shows a very real human view of life with severe autism. How terribly sad that wrong planet would use their forum to attack a severely autistic person, who is obviously in need of advocacy (which his family and disablity rights groups are trying hard to do in spite of opposition from anti-autism opponents). Shame on you wrong planet. You[ve missed the entire message and purpose of these kgaccount videos. The mom herself may be an HF aspie, which is something most of the wrong planet people don’t seem to get. Only she has empathy for her son, that apparently many of these wrong planet types don’t have.
I have Aspergers and am also a Christian. It has caused a considerable amount of trouble although I’m not sure if it’s the “good trouble” i.e. persecution that Jesus describes will come upon his loyal followers, or “bad trouble” due to my being a total social idiot. My IQ is very high, over 150. My social IQ, if there were such a thing, is below moron. I have taken several passages from the bible at face value and it has caused all kinds of problems in relationships, my career, my health and sanity, etc. I am not sure if my interpretation is “right” or “wrong” but I am just now becoming open (at 38 years old) to the idea that I may have taken some passages literally that were meant to be taken figuratively, that Jesus lays forth ideals to strive for rather than commands to be obeyed strictly. Being raised Catholic probably made things worse, leaving the Catholic church for a fundamentalist group in college probably made things even worse, and my inner conflict between the Catholic, protestant, fundamentalist, and athiest views vs. my own inner feelings and the written bible have led me to develop the bible as a “special interest” – those with Aspergers know what that means. I study topics and passages down to the original Greek and
Hebrew. I agonize about the meanings of passages and their implication for modern life and my life. I recently read a book about “scrupulosity” as a special religious form of OCD and it started me thinking. If Jesus came to give us abundant life, why is my life so dry and full of rules and mental torment? If you’re an aspie and a Christian feel free to contact me, nphmailbox-aspiechristian (at) yahoo (dot) com It has been torturous. My confusion due to gullibility and suggestibility mad me vulnerable to religious exploiters when I was younger, and led me on a quest to find the absolute “right” and “true” answers, which has been quite destructive. On the bright side, I do understand the bible well, which is horrifying in this day and age.
What you need is not more LOGOS of God, but more RHEMA of God! Pray for the gifts of the Holy Spirit. They are your spiritual heritage. That way, God can direct you in real-time. That way the Author of the Bible can help you interpret it and apply it. We certainly cannot lean on our own understanding!
I wnated to be healed from autism. I found some links that said that sickness are curses:
http://preparehisway.com/weekly_blog/view/698/why_would_god_hurt_me_.html
&
http://preparehisway.com/weekly_blog/view/660/can_christians_suffer_from_the_curse_.html
Also, I found a link about a lady who’s son delivered from autism:
http://www.unleavenedbreadministries.org/?page=autism-april
I am not saved and I wnat God to be the center of my life. I wanted to be healed and be delivered from these any of these curses that my holding me back that I don’t know of.
Any advice?
I will assume your problem is pure autism. You can’t say what you want and you are touch sensitive.
I know pastor Ricky Roberts in Jacksonville Florida who was struggling with retardation, but his mother was praying for him. He suddenly recovered and went on to get a doctorate! Sounds like autism to me.
We are under curses and blessings on numerous levels — individually, member of groups, our family, our extended family & generations, our businesses, our neighborhoods, our cities, counties, states and countries. And the big one, the curse on Adam and his seed. Only Jesus can free us from these curses. Jesus told us to “die” to these organizations and receive Him instead. To the extent we haven’t we are still vulnerable to the curses and demons of the world. Sanctification is a life long process.
A comprehensive prayer for this is found in:
http://www.orderofsaintpatrick.org/upton-course/personalities.pdf
That’s a start.
Your pastor doesn’t know what he is talking about. You are as God intended you to be.
Dan, we need to check that out with divine guidance. God only knows if we should accept our personal difference from society or not. If not, we need divine guidance as to how to resolve it.
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