Well we have known Kate has been pregnant for just under a week, and to be honest I’m seeing a lot of changes in the both of us. Kate is starting to realize how much of a blessing a disability such as Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) and Aspergers Syndrome are.
Yesterday she told me how boring ‘normal’ people are, and how she feels like ‘normal’ people take life and everything for advantage. Kate was expected to be dead at three, and if she lived past that to be in a vegetative state. I don’t think Kates parents when they adopted her ever thought they would see their daughter get in a relationship, get engaged, know their daughter is having sex, and now knowing shes pregnant. I’ve been thinking about this the last few days and how much Kate has been through in order for me to be able to be able to be marrying her in two months – shes been through three open heart surgeries, a birth mother that tried to abort her, and thats just the tip of the iceberg. After thinking about all these things it makes me understand why her parents can be overprotective better. (and just for the record – I never thought Kate’s parents were bad parents, just perhaps a bit eccentric.)
I think having disabilities, and knowing today that many people are aborted for just being disabled gives a much better and healthier perspective on abortion. Kate and I were looking through a lot of the pre-natal testing offered – much of which is genetic to detect disabilities and other things which society deems bad. This disgusted both Kate and I, and she has decided she will not go through genetic testing of any kind.
Would You Do Prenatal Genetic Testing?
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Congratulations!
Grandmother version of Liz here: take your prenatal vitamins!
I would strongly suggest a frank conversation, detailing both mother & father’s medical history, with your OB-GYN. Make your values clear.
Sample scenario for undergoing genetic testing while committing to carrying to term, no matter what the outcome of the testing
Let us say that your child-to-be does have trisomy 21 (Down syndrome). Some with this condition have serious heart defects, requiring emergency post-natal treatment. If your OB-GYN knows about the Down syndrome, he or she will be prepared and will have a cardiac team on notice.
So in short I’d urge you to get the testing that your OB-GYN recommends.
i am already taking prenatal vitamins
i am confused you say to make are values clear but still go threw the testing ??
I think if I were pregnant, I would have any testing that was safe. That rules out things like amniocentesis or CVS, which are invasive enough to raise the chance of miscarriage and should only be done if a non-invasive test suggests a problem.
I’d want to know about things ahead of time, so they could be treated. Some things can be treated while the child is still unborn, others do better if there’s special equipment or a specialist available in the delivery room.
No abortions, certainly. Knowing, however, is a good thing, as it means you can be prepared and perhaps even start treatment. Pre-natal diagnosis has saved the life of the fetus before.
I waved all the testing.. and I was pregnant at 40 years old.
I feel it (like everything) is a personal decision.. let others give advice.. listen to it.. then listen most importantly to what’s going on inside you. You’ll know best. Good Luck!
If you are going to have any testing (for Downs syndrome, for example) it might be important to have a doctor who is prolife to ensure he won’t pressure you to abort. I’ve heard of doctors who insisted on scheduling an abortion in such cases in spite of the loud objection of the mother-to-be.
I personally would not have done the genetic testing. The main reason behind most of it seems to be the elimination of ‘defective’ children, and if you are not planning to do that, it’s just an extra worry.
Congratulations to both of you
I hope things go well, no matter what you decide.
when i was pregnant with my second child, i didn’t find out until i was eleven weeks, but at my twelve week ultrasound scan, i was actually fourteen weeks pregnant, so it was too late for me to have the Nuchal Translucency test done. i was advised to have amniocentisis, and told there was a 1% risk of miscarriage, so after discussing with my partner decided that we thought the risk outweighed the benefit.
even if the test had shown me to be high risk for downs syndrome, or another genetic abnormality, we wouldn’t have done anything anyway…we were just delighted to be having a child no matter what.
when i had my next child, i did have the Nuchal Translucency test done, as it is none invasive, and although our attitude hadn’t changed, we did also think it was good to be preparred (i was a few years older by this stage too so would have been higher risk).
read all you can, make an informed choice and stick to your guns.